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xyzzysqrlGuess what point in the game we've reached! That's right, Russian spammer who wants to sell me terrifyingly specific pornography, we've reached the part of the game where I have explained basically all the systems and interactions and I can actually focus on playing it instead of alt-tabbing out every 36 seconds to describe how tank parts click together.
Last time, Connie and Clive and their boss Ciovanni ... I mean, Alex ... gave us a hot tip on where to go next. Obviously that seems like a good place to head. Away!
First off, we stop by the garage and buy the next level of armor protection. As an upgrade from stick-on bulletproof armor, we instead buy... packs of pot lids which we stuff in our clothes. Fantastic. A++ effort all around. More importantly, I finally hit the jackpot on the vending machine! The prize is... some healing capsules. Well that was absolutely worth it.
As we're rolling out of town, we get some mail from Dad.
Yeah I had worked that out, actually, but ... Alex's suggestion is the best lead we have, so I am of course going to follow up on it. So we head north through the desert, battling wasps with anti-tank rifles mounted on them and flying, semi-sentient helicopters...
...To eventually reach our first proper 'dungeon': A block of ruined buildings that pre-date the war.
Happily the hallways of most of the buildings are big enough to roll through. However, we do have to get out and take the stairs a little way into one, which leaves us kind of vulnerable.
One can only imagine what kinds of strange rites and rituals took place in forgotten chambers like this one. This kind of thing is why I think of Metal Saga as basically being JRPG Fallout.
Deep in the basement of one of the buildings, we find a machine called the "Mosquito" by the game, but called the Wiesel by history. I choose to cut across the difference and name it the Ferret. As we're busy laying claim to it, some other people show up. The lady in the lead introduces herself as Rosa Beldaire, and her butler as Sebastian (of course). Her... tag-along? Is Carl.
She claims to be a Hunter... but only because "big tanks really get my motor running". She doesn't care about fighting monsters or exploring, just collecting vehicles. She's already got one of those, though, so she cheerfully notes we can have it. "If I really wanted that tank, I'm sure you'd have given it to me!" she explains to the person with a 37mm gun aimed in her direction. Then she takes off. Oh well. We strip the improved model CPU out of the Ferret and click it into Alphonse, then run a tow rope out to the Ferret and drag it along with us while we explore.
We explore but find nothing much. There's a few parts and various trinkets. A handgun, which is outclassed by melee weapons. (I'm not sure we could hit, say, the helicopter with melee. Happily we don't HAVE to. Because we have TANKS for that.) We don't have to use the tanks either, though, because I soon find something called a "Boomerench", a hit-all throwing weapon for Winry which is super-strong against machines. Awesome.
Connie and Clive are let down by our findings. There just wasn't any neat lost technology to locate in that building, apparently! The Boomerench is not key to understanding the mysteries of the ancients. So it's back to town with the Ferret...
...And then I spend like four hours checking where I can park my tanks and figuring out where to leave them, playing with equipment loadouts and tuning, reloading because I spent all my money on equipment loadouts and tuning, trying to figure out what I can assemble or disassemble from the equipment I have, poking at the internet to see if I missed something, looking at pictures of cats on the internet, tinkering with loadouts some more, reloading because I spent all my money on loadout tinkering...
But all that stuff is BORING and I am not gonna write about it. Right now, I'm gonna drive to a semi-hidden place and show you all something COOL.
No no no.
Not that. That's not cool, that's just weird.
We drive way up north through the first band of desert, skirt the second band of desert (seriously do not go in the desert you will die) and pause briefly at "East Zero" to save. That's a nice town, I'll show that off next time. Right now we're just there to save and upgrade some armor. We also leave our tanks at the garage, since we're going somewhere on foot. Through the forest to the south of East Zero (we have to get out and walk once we're in the trees, our tanks'll need cleaning after being parked outdoors)...
To our next 'dungeon', the BioGenetics Lab. Connie and Clive are of course already there but they don't mind us looking around. It's the kind of place with a lot of big tubes standing upright, and rows of big dark mainframes lined up all blinkenlights... y'know. Sciencey shit. The game even takes a few moments to tell us useful facts as we search. Did you know pigeons can store up to 300 objects in their visual memory? I didn't either until I found a pile of pigeon poo on a windowsill and the game decided to go all Bill Nye on me about it.
I am NOT really supposed to be here yet, and the game lets me know it. Lots of health drinks are drunk, lots of pot lids are swapped into equipment, blown into scrap, and swapped out again. Yet, deep inside the facility, we uncover the truth about the BioGenetics facility. The horrible secret deep within the lair of the old world.
PUPPIES. OMG PUPPIES YAY PUPPIES. We choose to release them from storage, and a light comes on and the machine goes "whrrrrrrrr DING". Puppies come out of the microwave.
[IMPORTANT NOTE: PUPPIES SHOULD NOT COME OUT OF THE MICROWAVE. DO NOT PUT PUPPIES IN THE MICROWAVE. THAT IS HORRIBLE AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD FOR THINKING ABOUT IT.]
And so we can take a dog! We can take a Shibe...
A Tosa...
A Boston Terrier...
Or a St. Bernard.
So! What dog do we take, and what do we name it? OBVIOUSLY THIS IS CRITICALLY IMPORTANT (not really we can always come back and trade for one of the others) (but seriously CRITICALLY IMPORTANT.)
Next time: Hell if I know! This is about as far as I've ever gotten in this game! But hey, if YOU want to play Metal Saga too, why not pick up a copy? I'm sure this guy will give you a good price.
Last time, Connie and Clive and their boss Ciovanni ... I mean, Alex ... gave us a hot tip on where to go next. Obviously that seems like a good place to head. Away!
First off, we stop by the garage and buy the next level of armor protection. As an upgrade from stick-on bulletproof armor, we instead buy... packs of pot lids which we stuff in our clothes. Fantastic. A++ effort all around. More importantly, I finally hit the jackpot on the vending machine! The prize is... some healing capsules. Well that was absolutely worth it.
As we're rolling out of town, we get some mail from Dad.
Yeah I had worked that out, actually, but ... Alex's suggestion is the best lead we have, so I am of course going to follow up on it. So we head north through the desert, battling wasps with anti-tank rifles mounted on them and flying, semi-sentient helicopters...
...To eventually reach our first proper 'dungeon': A block of ruined buildings that pre-date the war.
Happily the hallways of most of the buildings are big enough to roll through. However, we do have to get out and take the stairs a little way into one, which leaves us kind of vulnerable.
One can only imagine what kinds of strange rites and rituals took place in forgotten chambers like this one. This kind of thing is why I think of Metal Saga as basically being JRPG Fallout.
Deep in the basement of one of the buildings, we find a machine called the "Mosquito" by the game, but called the Wiesel by history. I choose to cut across the difference and name it the Ferret. As we're busy laying claim to it, some other people show up. The lady in the lead introduces herself as Rosa Beldaire, and her butler as Sebastian (of course). Her... tag-along? Is Carl.
She claims to be a Hunter... but only because "big tanks really get my motor running". She doesn't care about fighting monsters or exploring, just collecting vehicles. She's already got one of those, though, so she cheerfully notes we can have it. "If I really wanted that tank, I'm sure you'd have given it to me!" she explains to the person with a 37mm gun aimed in her direction. Then she takes off. Oh well. We strip the improved model CPU out of the Ferret and click it into Alphonse, then run a tow rope out to the Ferret and drag it along with us while we explore.
We explore but find nothing much. There's a few parts and various trinkets. A handgun, which is outclassed by melee weapons. (I'm not sure we could hit, say, the helicopter with melee. Happily we don't HAVE to. Because we have TANKS for that.) We don't have to use the tanks either, though, because I soon find something called a "Boomerench", a hit-all throwing weapon for Winry which is super-strong against machines. Awesome.
Connie and Clive are let down by our findings. There just wasn't any neat lost technology to locate in that building, apparently! The Boomerench is not key to understanding the mysteries of the ancients. So it's back to town with the Ferret...
...And then I spend like four hours checking where I can park my tanks and figuring out where to leave them, playing with equipment loadouts and tuning, reloading because I spent all my money on equipment loadouts and tuning, trying to figure out what I can assemble or disassemble from the equipment I have, poking at the internet to see if I missed something, looking at pictures of cats on the internet, tinkering with loadouts some more, reloading because I spent all my money on loadout tinkering...
But all that stuff is BORING and I am not gonna write about it. Right now, I'm gonna drive to a semi-hidden place and show you all something COOL.
No no no.
Not that. That's not cool, that's just weird.
We drive way up north through the first band of desert, skirt the second band of desert (seriously do not go in the desert you will die) and pause briefly at "East Zero" to save. That's a nice town, I'll show that off next time. Right now we're just there to save and upgrade some armor. We also leave our tanks at the garage, since we're going somewhere on foot. Through the forest to the south of East Zero (we have to get out and walk once we're in the trees, our tanks'll need cleaning after being parked outdoors)...
To our next 'dungeon', the BioGenetics Lab. Connie and Clive are of course already there but they don't mind us looking around. It's the kind of place with a lot of big tubes standing upright, and rows of big dark mainframes lined up all blinkenlights... y'know. Sciencey shit. The game even takes a few moments to tell us useful facts as we search. Did you know pigeons can store up to 300 objects in their visual memory? I didn't either until I found a pile of pigeon poo on a windowsill and the game decided to go all Bill Nye on me about it.
I am NOT really supposed to be here yet, and the game lets me know it. Lots of health drinks are drunk, lots of pot lids are swapped into equipment, blown into scrap, and swapped out again. Yet, deep inside the facility, we uncover the truth about the BioGenetics facility. The horrible secret deep within the lair of the old world.
PUPPIES. OMG PUPPIES YAY PUPPIES. We choose to release them from storage, and a light comes on and the machine goes "whrrrrrrrr DING". Puppies come out of the microwave.
[IMPORTANT NOTE: PUPPIES SHOULD NOT COME OUT OF THE MICROWAVE. DO NOT PUT PUPPIES IN THE MICROWAVE. THAT IS HORRIBLE AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD FOR THINKING ABOUT IT.]
And so we can take a dog! We can take a Shibe...
A Tosa...
A Boston Terrier...
Or a St. Bernard.
So! What dog do we take, and what do we name it? OBVIOUSLY THIS IS CRITICALLY IMPORTANT (not really we can always come back and trade for one of the others) (but seriously CRITICALLY IMPORTANT.)
Next time: Hell if I know! This is about as far as I've ever gotten in this game! But hey, if YOU want to play Metal Saga too, why not pick up a copy? I'm sure this guy will give you a good price.
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no subject
Date: 2014-04-22 09:58 am (UTC)I also found a 75mm cannon on the top floor of he building nearest the entrance to town. Had to take my tank up the elevator to get it.
Hm. Dog. Dog dog dog. I vote.. St. Bernard. And name it Clairvaux.
no subject
Date: 2014-04-22 10:41 am (UTC)Ahem, yes. I lean mostly for the St. Bernard as well. The part of me that creates clever and funny nicknames is not well developed and might have burned out, though.
no subject
Date: 2014-04-22 05:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-04-23 12:07 am (UTC)more importantly, if there were dogs in microwaves at an ancient biogenetic research facility, how exactly did they survive in there all this time? are the microwaves secretly actual suspended animation and/or cryopreservation chambers that just happen to look like microwaves with giant ominous furnace pipes coming out of them?
because otherwise WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? YOU HAVE RELEASED THE IMMORTAL GODZILLA DOGS!
yeah, I'm gonna go with the dogs being immortal. And having super powers they will at some point turn against you.
I don't know why I am emotionally invested in your playing of this game now o___O
no subject
Date: 2014-04-23 01:25 am (UTC)It is a terrible thing that happens to people when I play games. Somehow it starts mattering. I don't know how this happens.