Depressed again.

[xyzzysqrl]

Having the strong feeling lately that everything I do is either incorrect, self-sabotaging, or both. Irritable and moody all the time.

Not sure how to cope with this. Frustrated, too... aren't I PAST this by now? I was OVER depression. And then I remember you can never never never actually BE over depression. Which is depressing all by itself.

I can't wait to see a dentist. I hope I get some nice distracting oral surgery or something. I could really fucking use something else to think about.

Comments

Have some distracting oral surgery

[sebkha.livejournal.com]

http://endling.deviantart.com/art/Teef-243683793

[silveradept]

It certainly seems that you're doing great from our perspective. Would you like a certified Hammerspace mallet to whack away the depression?

[read-alicia.livejournal.com]

You're doing awesome, underserved work with the write-ups and the future videos. And not everybody is going to tell you that - for example, in the podcasting "community", the general rule is that you'll hear back from one listener out of each batch of 1000-10000 listeners. People are just used to consuming and moving on, assuming that someone else will do the good work of complimenting the host.
So your depression is probably about a lot of other things, but I wanted to let you know that you do have something you're good at.

If you need distraction, try getting this out of your head after you hear it.

[xyzzysqrl]

Hee. Is "undeserved" really the word you wanted to use there?

But no, throwing a ragequit fit over "lack of feedback" or whatever would just be petty. I'm enjoying Vesperia, I just had a huge mood crash recently due to teeth, due to a lack of ability to do video editing, due to trying to write and rapidly failing, due to... a lotta stuff.

It's all personal things, really.