Just Cause 2.

[xyzzysqrl]

I've been playing the demo of a video game called "Just Cause 2" over and over and over recently, and I've decided to write down a bit of why it amuses me.

Basically, the formula for the game is "Physics Minus Morals Plus Hilarity". Imagine if you were Spider-Man, except you were a giant asshole. Also, you were a latin man who identifies with scorpions instead of spiders, you work in South America or something, you're a terrorist, and your goal is to cause as much chaos as possible.

So not Spider-Man at all, but you do have an AWESOME GRAPPLING HOOK. You can use this thing, which is somehow elastic and high-tension at the same time, to chain people to objects. To chain objects to objects. To chain yourself to objects. You can, for example, use a helicopter to pull the head off a statue, then swing it around like a wrecking ball. Doing so and whacking five people with it earns you extra demo time. You can climb on top of a car, surf around like the Freelance Police (assault rifle blazing), and just staple pedestrians to the side of the car. You earn extra demo time for that. You can chain a box to a tank of Movie Gas, so when you shoot the tank it flies away at high speed, and the box hits a dude in the face.

There's also the "Stunt Jump" button. This makes you leap around on moving vehicles. If you happen to pass a motorcyclist and hit the stunt jump button, you ass-tackle them off the bike and wheelie away on it. You DON'T earn time for that, but I think that's just because it's such a BASIC asshole move. Just Cause 2 is not impressed with your ass-tackle. Try harder.

Your stated goal in the game, incidentally, is "Turn this island into a smoking hell."

So you may begin to see why this is my kind of game. I'm seriously tempted to pick it up. All that's holding me back is that I don't want to buy things without talking it over with the woof, but I'm sure once he sees me flying a helicopter upside-down over a small Latin American village while blazing wildly away with dual chainguns, he will have no choice but to be persuaded. This is the kind of game The Internet plays and goes "But there's nothing to DO, and all the goals are too far apart." Meanwhile, it's the kind of game I play and emit a constant "HURRRR!" of giggling amusement even the 50,000th time I surf a car off a cliff.

(Also, Steam invites me to "Pre-Order Just Cause 2 and receive 10% off until it is released." At which point... what, I have to give them the 10% back?)

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

>> (Also, Steam invites me to "Pre-Order Just Cause 2 and receive 10% off until it is released." At which point... what, I have to give them the 10% back?)

They pre-load 90% of the game onto your computer, and it downloads the last 10% on release day!

damn bunni

[relee.livejournal.com]

Oh that sounds delightful! ^.^

[ff00ff.livejournal.com]

Your playing of Just Cause 2 has caused me to look up related media. I had heard nothing of this game until you mentioned it, and now am convinced it is pure digital ecstasy. Why is march so replete with games I must have? Supreme Commander 2, Assassin's Creed 2, Command & Conquer 4, Dawn of War 2: Chaos Rising, Just Cause 2.

I know things!

[masstreble.livejournal.com]

Hay your birthday is coming up soon!

[vulpisfoxfire.livejournal.com]

Heh. I remember the videos of 'helicopter surfing' (grabbing a heli and letting it carry you along) for the first game. And it sounds like you're playing that demo the same way my brother and I tend to play the GTA games. Plot? Missions? Who cares! Just grab your baseball bat, chainsaw, an molotovs, and go terrorize the populace with them! Or if you want, grab a Semi truck and recreate Death Race 2000. :-) (The fact that there's a semi and a bus in a couple of the games that have side-missions specifically about doing as much damage as you can in a time limit probably doesn't help. Or does help, depending on how you look at it. :-) )