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xyzzysqrlTHE STORY SO FAR:
Mankind was the chick. The world was its egg. Trapped inside too long, man hatched from inside the Earth onto the surface and immediately found pressure to die or return inside. This pressure came in the form of giant robots.
Mankind was having none of that. Some of them did die, and some were forced back underground, but others took the giant robots and punched oppression in the face and chest until it went away. And mankind spread over the surface and took back the world they were forced to abandon.
Of course, more oppression (and more giant robots) came to keep them on Earth or destroy them entirely. Then mankind looked up at the night sky and found it rather resembled an eggshell.
Mankind was having none of that either. It was time to break free again.
--
Scene fades in on LEERON, who is playing with a gyroscope.
Leeron: "When you spin one of these very fast, it always stays pointed skyward. It's a natural law. Also, it is a metaphor. No matter how hard Simon has been tossed around and battered in his life, he has remained drill-like, thrusting rigidly upward with his powerful..."
Some STUFF EXPLODES and a crewmember opens Leeron's door.
Crew: "HEY. Y'wanna get out here and help us in this big space battle, or do you want to play with toys all day?"
Leeron goes to the bridge. The supporting cast is there.
Supporting cast: "WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE."
Simon, Viral: "WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE?"
Simon and Viral blow up a hell of a lot of enemy robots using the power of being REAL MEN. The enemies rally and recombine to hold the Lagann and the human spaceship hostage. Simon responds by combining with the human battleship, forming an EVEN BIGGER robot.
Rossiu: "...what. Just. Happened. Why are we in a giant robot now?"
Simon: "Yo dawg. I heard you like giant robots, so we put a giant robot in your battleship so we can drill shit while you fly around in space!"
Rossiu: "...and what is PILOTING this giant robot, may I ask?"
Simon: "Another, smaller giant robot."
Leeron: "This entire show is based on the principle of stacking Russian dolls, you know."
The newly formed ARK GURRAN LAGANN totally punches an ENORMOUS GAPING HOLE in space-time and shoves the enemy through it.
Logic: "...buhwhat. ... Maybe it's a metaphor for how strong they are...?"
Bridge Crew: "What's that?"
Leeron: "It's a totally non-metaphorical hole the Ark Gurren Lagann just punched in space-time."
Simon: "BECAUSE WE ARE AWESOME."
Everyone Else: "YEAAAAAAH!"
Logic: *gives up, packs suitcase, takes bus trip to Kansas*
Leeron: "By the way, the moon is about to hit the earth."
The moon CRACKS APART, revealing a giant evil leering face.
Population of Earth, twitching and gazing upward: "...three days... three days..."
Simon: "Hell with that. Viral, let's rock."
Viral: "Whatever, monkey boy. I'm in this to hit things."
Disembodied Head of Lord Genome: "...the moon belongs to me."
Viral: "...wait. What? Lord Genome?"
Genome: "The moon is my spaceship."
Viral: "It IS you. And you're senile."
Simon: "Wait, he's on to something here."
The moon is huge. That means it has HUGE GUTS. Like the huge guts the Gurren Lagann flies into! Inside the moon they find a giant drill-shaped hole. Suddenly, EVIL ANTI-SPIRAL NIA APPEARS to stop them from plugging this hole. Drillblocked.
EASN: "Our invasion of your world has left you in despair!"
Simon: "Not really."
EASN: "That is how we function. Every strike is designed to make you despair more. Soon, you will reach ABSOLUTE DESPAIR."
Simon: "Absolute despair sounds a lot like absolute motivation to me!"
EASN: "Your chance of success is less than 2%."
Simon: "2% sounds a lot like 100% to me!"
Viral: "Remind me never to buy lowfat milk from you."
EASN: "You have no chance to survive make your time."
Simon: "You're still wearing my ring."
EASN turns into Nia!
Nia: "Simon. Come save me. Your princess is in the Anti-Spiral Lair."
Simon: "I'll come for you."
And so they plug the giant drill-hole and HUMANITY IS SAVED FROM THE MOON as the moon turns into a gianter battleship, which presumably in the future the giant-robot battleship will dock with and you will have a robot piloting a robot piloting a robot piloting a robot and god I love this show.
Hopefully NEXT TIME I will have an actual CLUSTER of episodes.
(Also, man I am rusty. This one is way considerably less with the funny than most of my previous. Ah well.)
Mankind was the chick. The world was its egg. Trapped inside too long, man hatched from inside the Earth onto the surface and immediately found pressure to die or return inside. This pressure came in the form of giant robots.
Mankind was having none of that. Some of them did die, and some were forced back underground, but others took the giant robots and punched oppression in the face and chest until it went away. And mankind spread over the surface and took back the world they were forced to abandon.
Of course, more oppression (and more giant robots) came to keep them on Earth or destroy them entirely. Then mankind looked up at the night sky and found it rather resembled an eggshell.
Mankind was having none of that either. It was time to break free again.
--
Scene fades in on LEERON, who is playing with a gyroscope.
Leeron: "When you spin one of these very fast, it always stays pointed skyward. It's a natural law. Also, it is a metaphor. No matter how hard Simon has been tossed around and battered in his life, he has remained drill-like, thrusting rigidly upward with his powerful..."
Some STUFF EXPLODES and a crewmember opens Leeron's door.
Crew: "HEY. Y'wanna get out here and help us in this big space battle, or do you want to play with toys all day?"
Leeron goes to the bridge. The supporting cast is there.
Supporting cast: "WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE."
Simon, Viral: "WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE?"
Simon and Viral blow up a hell of a lot of enemy robots using the power of being REAL MEN. The enemies rally and recombine to hold the Lagann and the human spaceship hostage. Simon responds by combining with the human battleship, forming an EVEN BIGGER robot.
Rossiu: "...what. Just. Happened. Why are we in a giant robot now?"
Simon: "Yo dawg. I heard you like giant robots, so we put a giant robot in your battleship so we can drill shit while you fly around in space!"
Rossiu: "...and what is PILOTING this giant robot, may I ask?"
Simon: "Another, smaller giant robot."
Leeron: "This entire show is based on the principle of stacking Russian dolls, you know."
The newly formed ARK GURRAN LAGANN totally punches an ENORMOUS GAPING HOLE in space-time and shoves the enemy through it.
Logic: "...buhwhat. ... Maybe it's a metaphor for how strong they are...?"
Bridge Crew: "What's that?"
Leeron: "It's a totally non-metaphorical hole the Ark Gurren Lagann just punched in space-time."
Simon: "BECAUSE WE ARE AWESOME."
Everyone Else: "YEAAAAAAH!"
Logic: *gives up, packs suitcase, takes bus trip to Kansas*
Leeron: "By the way, the moon is about to hit the earth."
The moon CRACKS APART, revealing a giant evil leering face.
Population of Earth, twitching and gazing upward: "...three days... three days..."
Simon: "Hell with that. Viral, let's rock."
Viral: "Whatever, monkey boy. I'm in this to hit things."
Disembodied Head of Lord Genome: "...the moon belongs to me."
Viral: "...wait. What? Lord Genome?"
Genome: "The moon is my spaceship."
Viral: "It IS you. And you're senile."
Simon: "Wait, he's on to something here."
The moon is huge. That means it has HUGE GUTS. Like the huge guts the Gurren Lagann flies into! Inside the moon they find a giant drill-shaped hole. Suddenly, EVIL ANTI-SPIRAL NIA APPEARS to stop them from plugging this hole. Drillblocked.
EASN: "Our invasion of your world has left you in despair!"
Simon: "Not really."
EASN: "That is how we function. Every strike is designed to make you despair more. Soon, you will reach ABSOLUTE DESPAIR."
Simon: "Absolute despair sounds a lot like absolute motivation to me!"
EASN: "Your chance of success is less than 2%."
Simon: "2% sounds a lot like 100% to me!"
Viral: "Remind me never to buy lowfat milk from you."
EASN: "You have no chance to survive make your time."
Simon: "You're still wearing my ring."
EASN turns into Nia!
Nia: "Simon. Come save me. Your princess is in the Anti-Spiral Lair."
Simon: "I'll come for you."
And so they plug the giant drill-hole and HUMANITY IS SAVED FROM THE MOON as the moon turns into a gianter battleship, which presumably in the future the giant-robot battleship will dock with and you will have a robot piloting a robot piloting a robot piloting a robot and god I love this show.
Hopefully NEXT TIME I will have an actual CLUSTER of episodes.
(Also, man I am rusty. This one is way considerably less with the funny than most of my previous. Ah well.)
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And here is your reward.
Date: 2009-03-21 11:40 am (UTC)There's something different about Viral these days, but I can't put my finger
on her cheston her boobsoh my god seriously those are niceon it.no subject
Date: 2009-03-21 03:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-21 03:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-21 10:12 pm (UTC)You have no idea how sad that made me when it happened. :)
no subject
Date: 2009-03-21 10:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-21 10:15 pm (UTC)Yeah, get on those last few eps. You're almost there!