I hate you, biology.

[xyzzysqrl]

The part I hate most about being sick...

I'm sick, by the way. Feverish, harfy, the works. Gah.

...the part I hate most about being sick is that my body likes to jerk me around when I'm sick.



I wake up in the middle of the night. AUGH. Bathroom time.

Arrive at bathroom. Sit down. Wait. Wait. Wait. Nothing. False alarm!

Stand up. Oops, no, gotta go! Sit down. Nothing.

Stand up. Wait, queasy now. Turn around, lean forward. ... No, need to pee.

Stand back up. Wait, must sit again. Sit down, turn ar... VOMIT TIME NOW EMERGENCY.

Etc. Etc.

Seriously, what the HELL, body? Pick an orifice!



This is hopefully the grossest thing I'll ever write here. Just... frustrated. Screw you, biology. I'm getting a nutrient tank and a brainectomy.

Comments

the human(oid) body

[circuit-four.livejournal.com]

As I've said so many times: built by evolution, Nature's lowest bidding subcontractor. :(

Get well soon! *dons hazmat and hugs you very gently*

[relee.livejournal.com]

I think that happens becuase of gas bubbles trapped in the body, it feels like it's gotta come out downstairs but it's trapped by solid waste, so your body tries to relieve the pressure by making you throw up, but you might burp instead or something, then the pressure goes back to your anus, and it's all sorts of crazy.

[kiruppert.livejournal.com]