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LAST TIME ON HIGURASHI:

Tanako: "So, Keiichi, where'd you hide the body?"

WE NOW RETURN:

Keiichi: "...What?"
Tanako: "I hid the one I was burying pretty well."
Keiichi: "What?"
Tanako: "Wow, you don't crack easy. Ah well! By the way, tell anyone we met and I will kill you with violence."
Keiichi: "...n-no, really, what? I missed what you were saying while having a GODDAMN HEART ATTACK."

The NEXT DAY:

Keiichi: "At least Satoko's uncle won't be abusing her any more."
Satoko: "My uncle is still abusing me. Last night he was a total bastard."
Keiichi: "I reiterate: What?"

Keiichi goes and digs up the hole he buried Satoko's uncle in, with GUEST STAR Ooshi to keep him working. There's nobody there. I mean, no body. No bodies in the hole. This distresses Keiichi.

Keiichi, at the hospital: "Have you ever killed someone, and then they weren't dead when you checked later?"
Doctor: "Aaah hahahaha. Let's get you sedated 'til your eyeballs roll back."
Keiichi: "I can't understand why he doesn't understand. I wish he'd just die. ... Hey. I wonder how Satoko's doing. I should check on that. With my axe, just in case of surprise uncle."

Keiichi finds Satoko at her house, huddled in the shower and twitching and counting. He carries her off to the HOSPITAL and finds that Ooshi and the Doctor are both DEAD now. Oops.

Satoko: "...let's go to Rika's place. I think some of my clothes are there."
Keiichi: "You know. I totally murdered your uncle a few days back."
Satoko: "I'm not having this conversation."
Keiichi: "And I think I killed the police guy and that doctor just by wishing for it."
Satoko: "Would really appreciate you being somewhere else now. I'm gonna go get dressed."

Keiichi, left alone, wanders towards the shrine. On the way, he finds a T-SHIRT and puts it on.
Keiichi: "Hey, just my size."

At the shrine, he finds the grusomely-murdered body of Rika. He drops his axe in the blood next to the body.

Keiichi: "HOLY CRAP! ... Oops, better grab my axe."

At this point, Satoko returns and finds Keiichi, confessed multiple murderer, standing over Rika holding a blood-soaked axe and wearing a t-shirt that reads "I AM AN AXE MURDERER."

Satoko: "... fuck this."
She flees.
Keiichi, in pursuit, waving bloody axe: "WAIT! COME BACK! THIS CAN TOTALLY BE EXPLAINED!"
The chase scene ends when Keiichi disarms himself and allows an eight year old girl to throw him off a bridge. OUR HERO.

Keiichi, falling: "...this town sucks and should die."

Newscaster, one night later: "Volcanic gas vents opened up and the entire town of Hinamizawa died today, except one boy named Keiichi who was fished out of the river."

BAD END. START AGA... wait, no...

For the NEXT LOOP we pull back in history to a POLICE INVESTIGATOR who is tracking the kidnapped child of a government official. This provides a lot of background DETAIL and lots of RIKA being CUTE, but does not really make for a FUNNY SUMMARY. It was interesting though.

NEXT ARC:

Shion: "Hello. I'm Shion, who you may remember as "the quiet one" of the Mion/Shion duo. In my spare time, I am a RAVING NUTBAR. Let's explore some of the consequences of that."
Satoshi: "I'm the boy Keiichi is always being favorably compared to. I "vanished a year ago" in all previous story arcs. This one is set during my time in town."
Shion: "I like Satoshi more than is strictly reasonable for the amount of time I've known him."
Satoshi: "I have no reason to suspect this will end badly."