Holy crud.

[xyzzysqrl]

Meat chips.

Not meat-flavored crisps, like the british pub food. No, I mean, chips of meat made crispy.

This is the worst thing I have ever put in my mouth on purpose. Augh.

Comments

[tama-grey.livejournal.com]

gag me with a spoon.

Just reading that made me feel icky.

[momentrabbit.livejournal.com]

Er.. are they crispy because they're dry, or because they're cooked, or because they're deep fried...

And.. I hesitate to ask such a delicate question, but.. what sort of meat would they be?

[xyzzysqrl]

They're very thin and baked. Oven baked, it hastens to add.

And they're beef. Very beef. Incredibly beef. They're like CONCENTRATED beef. One of these is your beef needs for the ENTIRE YEAR.

[foxish.livejournal.com]

As The Squirrelian mentions, they are quite baked. Overbaked, to be honest.

The "chips" are extremely dry and rather brittle--they crack when bitten into, like a potato chip would. The baking process appears to have removed any degree of flavour they ever had left, meaning they taste only like what they've been dunked into liberally. The bag I had, well over a year ago, was "plain", so it was a wonderful snack of crunchy cardboard nuggets.

I gather from other reviews that they have since begun applying liberal bursts of "flavourant" to them, likely powdered beef proteins and a garlic-onion-salt powder. Just like mother used to make when she was quite cross with me.

[thewerewolf.livejournal.com]

Pork rinds

[xyzzysqrl]

Pork rinds are at least puffed fat and skin. I don't mind those. I really don't. (I'm part southern.)
But... these were MEAT and every flavoring EVER. Plus more onion powder than god intended there to be on any substance.

[kiruppert.livejournal.com]

Oh dear god. I'm just going to pretend you ate Jerky and that Meat Chips (*Shudder*) Don't exist.

-K

[mulethunder.livejournal.com]

That comic in your buddy icon. What is it called? Do you know where I can find it?

[kiruppert.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it was from a 1996 comic based on the video game Doom, which was apparently (According to Wikipedia) given out as swag at the Id Software booth at some video game convention or another. You can find scans of it occasionally floating around the internet. Just a warning though, it's... um... bad. Very bad. Almost certainly intentionally so.

-K

[xyzzysqrl]

http://www.doomworld.com/10years/doomcomic/

[slipscale.livejournal.com]

Jerky = Good
Pork Crackling = Good
Meat chips = SATAN! SATAN IN A BAG!!

[klikbewm.livejournal.com]

While bacon could arguably become crispy meat chips, depending on how you make it, I'm also certain most folks don't liberally roll their bacon through a vat of "natural flavorings" and onion powder.

I am sorry for your tongue!

[foxish.livejournal.com]

I remember these. They tasted of cardboard and meat flavoured proteins. Quite awful, and anyone who knows me knows my stance on meat-based foods.