Life with Woof and Sqrl - Cake

Woof, bringing in groceries: "So far I only have the cake, but I'll get the rest next trip."

Sqrl: "Cake? Is it your-- no, your birthday's in September right? ... why cake?"

Woof: "Well, it's been dark and gloomy around here and we're both depressed, and I was walking by the baked stuff department and I saw this cake and it was chocolate, right? Chocolate cake, it doesn't really need a reason, so..."

Sqrl, unbagging cake and regarding the top: "Oh cool we can cut off Santa's face!"

Woof: *derailed*

Sqrl: "And eat it!"

Woof: "...I really wish you required slightly more motivation or justification to be a creepy-ass cannibal motherfucker but that thought DID make you smile, so you know what? I'll take it."


*hearts* yay cake *hearts*

[EDIT]
Hours later...

Sqrl: "Can you put in the ... crunch bread ... things?"

Woof: "What."

Sqrl: "Uh... Ah, these french bread pizza things from the freezer? Can we put them in the oven?"

Woof: "OH. Okay. I thought you wanted me to make you popcorn that we don't have, or something. Just pull a popcorn maker we don't own out of the cupboard..."

Sqrl: "How tenuous do you think my grip on reality is, really?"

Woof, no hesitation: "Extremely."

Sqrl: "Still, that's ridiculous."

Woof: "EARLIER you were talking about EATING SANTA'S FACE."

Sqrl: "Santa's real though, he's on that cake we bought."

Woof: "Uh, lovie ... I have some bad news for you about Santa?"

Sqrl: "NO. YOU SHUT UP."

Woof: "...I am living with a six year old."